Hollywood is officially over

Better add new screens at the Hell Cineplex.

Coming this fall:

• Footloose
• The Three Musketeers (featuring a chick this time and Matrix-style special effects; will it include a remake of one of the worst songs of all time from the last Musketeers remake?)
• A Very Harold and Kumar Christmas
• Jack and Jill (with Adam Sandler in drag)
• The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part I
• The Muppets
• New Year’s Eve (a sequel, of sorts, to one of the most godawful pieces of dreck I’ve ever wasted five minutes on, “Valentine’s Day”)
• Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chip-Wrecked
• Mission: Impossible Ghost Protocol (the Cult of Scientology must need a cash infusion)