Marginalizing ourselves

“I took a trip out to California last week, where I had some productive bilateral talks with your leader, Lady Gaga. She was wearing 16-inch heels. She was eight feet tall. It was a little intimidating,” President Obama joked to some 3,000 gay rights activists during his keynote address at the annual dinner of the Human Rights Campaign on Saturday evening.

I’m not offended by a joke but it’s sad there’s some truth in it. Substitute Kanye West for Lady Gaga and the NAACP for the HRC and see how well that goes over.

I’ll note that the HRC has proven to be a rather feckless organization so Gaga would probably be an improvement over the likes of Joe Solmonese.

Gaymos and Dandy return

Actually, that’s not fair. Amos and Andy were offensive caricatures, no doubt, but were not vain, shallow, materialistic, melodramatic, backstabbing gossips like the offensive caricatures on MTVGay’s “The A List.”

Yet the Petty Queer Establishment is silent. They must be busy searching for offensive language in the DVD release of a Ron Howard movie no one saw.

A movement hasn’t matured until it feels comfortable calling out its own. Ours remains sadly juvenile, just like the miserable bitches on Gaymos and Dandy. By the way, they’ve added a new cast member: a former pageant winner who describes herself as a “fierce diva.”

I guess she’s playing the mascot role filled by gays on the Real Housewives shows. I suppose we’re equal now.

Contrived contrition

I think most would agree the public apology is played out. First, Anthony Weiner couldn’t shut up about his dick. Now Tracy Morgan is on an apology tour, sponsored by GLAAD, following his recent anti-gay rant.

Surely you know the drill. GLAAD will grant absolution in exchange for a series of highly choreographed mea culpas and a sizable donation. Perhaps the LGBT souffle should demand some contrition from GLAAD. Make the check out to ATLmalcontent.

Quid pro crock

AT&T is lining up support for its acquisition of T-Mobile from a slew of liberal groups with no obvious interest in telecom deals — except that they’ve received big piles of AT&T’s cash.

In recent weeks, the NAACP, the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation and the National Education Association have each issued public statements in support of the deal.

The groups all say their public positions have nothing to do with the money they received from AT&T. And AT&T says it supports nonprofit groups because it’s the right thing to do — and not because of any quid pro quo.


The fallout has begun, as GLAAD’s president resigned Friday. Unfortunately, the irrelevant organization he led remains.

‘Glee’ even more insufferable than I imagined

I’ve avoided “Glee” like chlamydia. As I understand it’s an inspirational musical featuring a slew of nonsensical celebrity cameos. Might as well be a buddy comedy starring Robin Williams and Adam Sandler, directed by Michael Bay.

But it’s even worse than I thought. Recently “Glee” creator Ryan Murphy ripped Kings of Leon after the once-interesting Nashville band denied the show’s request to use their music.

“They’re self-centred a*sholes, and they’re missing the big picture,” Murphy said. “They missed that a seven-year-old kid can see someone close to their age singing a Kings of Leon song, which will maybe make them want to join a glee club or pick up a musical instrument.

“It’s like, OK, hate on arts education.”

You’ll recall that, before “Glee” dared a nation to dream, kids never aspired to become rock stars.

More hyperbole from the professionally aggrieved

News flash: GLAAD is offended! The Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation is demanding an apology from SNL over a recent sketch about estrogen replacement theory. Lives are at risk, apparently.

This Saturday, on an airing of Saturday Night Live, NBC (a subsidiary of Comcast) broadcast a dangerous and blatantly transphobic segment which they called ‘Estro-Maxxx’ – the punchline of which was the lives of countless transgender people across the country. …

Holding people up for ridicule simply on the basis of their identity fuels a dangerous and hurtful climate and puts people in danger

Just once I’d like to see GLAAD speak out against the queer caricatures that routinely appear on allegedly gay-friendly outlets. Instead the group celebrates the reinforcement of stale stereotypes, handing out awards to the most flamboyant performance by a gay mascot on a reality show, for example.

Borrowing from their boilerplate rhetoric, I demand GLAAD apologize for its hypocrisy.

Chick-fil-A may not like me, but I like Chick-fil-A

Chick-fil-A is the best fast food chain in America. Period. They’re efficient, courteous and consistent. I could care less about their CEO’s politics.

The Atlanta-based company has come under fire from gay rights groups for supplying food to an event sponsored by the Pennsylvania Family Institute, which has worked to defeat same-sex marriage initiatives. (I guess feeding religious fundamentalists crosses some sort of progressive line in the sand.)

Granted, Chick-fil-A is sympathetic to the Pennsylvania Family Institute’s cause, as is half the country. So what? Fast food chains neither shape or influence public opinion.

To those who want to boycott, fine. It’s not my time you’re wasting. But this kind of hyperbole (excerpted from an online petition against Chick-fil-A by students at Florida Gulf Coast University) will prove counterproductive:

“The Student Union is a place where all students should feel safe and welcome. By allowing a company with a history of bigotry and homophobia into our campus, we potentially allow FGCU to place monetary gain above the comfort and safety of the very students who are expected to frequent the Union Building,” say the group of students at FGCU.

‘Cause you never know when a Chick-fil-A manager might spork you in the eye for wearing a Margaret Cho T-shirt.

I’m curious as to where all this ends. Should I research the political leanings of the company that installed the drinking fountains where I work? I’d hate to think I was consuming anti-gay water.

ATLmalcontent charges GLAAD with ‘hurtful, dehumanizing’ language

Did you know GLAAD stands for the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation? Just last week the media arm of the Petty Queer Establishment harrumphed that “gay” is a slur and demanded its removal from a new Ron Howard comedy.

So why the hypocrisy, GLAAD? And how come your acronym hasn’t expanded? Where’s the “T’ and the “Q”?

Even Susan Sarandon finds GLAAD insufferable, blasting them for taking issue with “Glee” for using the word “tranny” in a recent episode.

“What should they have said?” the actress asked the New York Post, saying that she has plenty of friends who proudly consider themselves to be “tra**ies.” She said GLAAD is “getting like PETA — way out of control.”

The Petty Queer Establishment vs. Richie Cunningham

GLAAD took time off from planning its next awards ceremony to play national scold, charging director Ron Howard with contributing to anti-gay bullying.

In Howard’s new film “The Dilemma,” a character played by Vince Vaughn says “electric cars are gay” then explains that he doesn’t mean “homosexual, gay, but, you know, my parents are chaperoning the dance, gay.”

Are you kidding me? Once again, GLAAD saves its indignation for something trivial. Check out their over-the-top statement on the alleged controversy:

“At a time when so many in our country are speaking out against the bullying of gay youth, Universal was right to acknowledge the offensive nature of this ‘joke’ when it removed it from trailers,” said GLAAD President Jarrett Barrios. “Unfortunately, by leaving it in the movie, they are now contributing to the problem. The conversations started as a result of the community’s response to this slur will help schools, media and parents understand the impact of the word ‘gay’ being used as a pejorative. Hopefully in the future, Universal and Ron Howard will recognize the power of their words and use their films to bring people together rather than drive us apart.”

I’m with Opie:

“I defend the right for some people to express offense at a joke as strongly as I do the right for that joke to be in a film. But if storytellers, comedians, actors and artists are strong armed into making creative changes, it will endanger comedy as both entertainment and a provoker of thought.”

Next, on ‘The Real JAP’s of Hymietown’ …

I finally endured about 15 minutes of “The A-List,” a truly wretched new reality show about callow gay Mahattanites. Stepin Fetchit eating a watermelon outside a fried chicken shack would only be a tad less offensive.

If I lived in Kansas and popular entertainment provided my only exposure to gays, I’d hate us, too. Yet most in the expanding acronym community remain unmoved.

The Petty Queer Establishment may not be directly involved in the production of such images, but they routinely commend them.

“It is with great pride that GLAAD honors MTV with our highest mark of excellence in recognition of the network’s commitment to fair and accurate representation of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community,” said GLAAD president Jarrett Barrios in a statement (July 2010).

MTV — home to many a gay caricature in its years on the air — and Logo are owned by Viacom, also responsible for spreading more vapid consumerism than should be legally permissable. Either the PQE doesn’t realize the damage caused by such shallow stereotypes, or they’ve completely sold out. Bet on the latter.

Why else would they celebrate the achievements of the chief propaganidst of the anti-gay movement?

Don’t waste your time being offended because some asshole actor you’ve never heard of called some other actor you’ve never heard of a fag. Get mad about this shit and ask why organizations that are supposed to champion equality so often undermine the cause.

And if, by chance, you recognize any of the “characters” from “The A-List,” find some new friends. Or see a therapist. Probably both.

The Petty Queer Establishment strikes again

“It is with great pride that GLAAD honors MTV with our highest mark of excellence in recognition of the network’s commitment to fair and accurate representation of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community,” said GLAAD president Jarrett Barrios in a statement.

If the token gay guy from whatever season’s “The Real World” is “an accurate representation” of the community, we’re in worse trouble than I feared.