Chris Brown is a product of our times

Don’t let the headline fool you — I don’t make excuses for arrogant pricks who beat up women.

I leave that to the media enablers who Chris Brown awards and invite him to sell his product on their air despite the fact he’s taken no responsibility for beating the shit out of his former girlfriend. To the Rosie O’Donnell’s of the world who think everyone is a victim — even Chris Brown. And to those who tell us self-promotion isn’t to be discouraged, but celebrated.

You rationalized Chris Brown — live with the consequences.

“Well, I would say I’m an inspirational guidelines book. You can take my life story or scenarios or songs and relate to them, and apply them to your everyday life. You know, whether it be personal or musical, I just think I’m a walking art piece, just a ball of creativity.”


It’s okay to hate on Gwyneth Paltrow (UPDATED)

She sure has it rough.

“I think it’s different when you have an office job, because it’s routine and, you know, you can do all the stuff in the morning and then you come home in the evening,” said the polarizing Paltrow. “When you’re shooting a movie, they’re like, ‘We need you to go to Wisconsin for two weeks,’ and then you work 14 hours a day and that part of it is very difficult. I think to have a regular job and be a mom is not as, of course there are challenges, but it’s not like being on set.”


“Some days I feel like everyone in my world has plugged themselves into my kidneys. I’m so tired.”

“I think that women, especially women in my job, come to me because they know I’m very loving and nonjudgmental and I’m not competitive, and I’ve been through a lot.” [Harper’s]

“Having survived her 10th London winter (she got through January by assigning it “international month,” and amusing Moses and his big sister, Apple, 9, with a visiting Italian chef, Japanese anime screenings, and hand-rolled-sushi lessons, no less), Paltrow admits that her dreams of relocating the family to their recently acquired residence in Brentwood, California, are becoming ever more urgent. [Harper’s Bazaar]

On taking a retreat to Sedona, Arizona:

“I’ll never forget it. I was starting to hike up the red rocks, and honestly, it was as if I heard the rock say: ‘You have the answers. You are your teacher.’ I thought I was having an auditory hallucination.”

Go here for 41 more odious Paltrow quotes.


Pot to kettle: F*** you!

Ted Cruz, in his bid to become a one-man branch of government, actually said this Tuesday as the U.S. Senate debated funding the government:

“There is a tendency in this town toward brinksmanship, towards pointing to events that can cause instability and uncertainty and using them to try to get your way.”


List of most influential conservatives says it all

Note that this list was compiled by, a conservative website.

Three talk show hosts are in the Top 10: Beck, Hannity and Limbaugh. A fourth, Mark Levin, ranks 12th.

Ranking 3rd?

3) Sarah Palin: The former VP candidate has a fanatical following, regularly makes news for her attacks on the Obama Administration, and did more to get women elected in 2010 than any one human being ever has before in a single election cycle. Palin has enormous juice, but the key question is always, “What is she going to do with it? Run for office? Get other Republicans elected? Become the conservative Oprah?” Time will tell.


A thesis script too far

This is what happens when you spend too much time — which in this case would be 1 minute — pondering the significance of a fame-starved moron’s performance at an awards show.

 But the shock that Cyrus was peddling wasn’t sex. It was all about race.

Cyrus has spent a lot of time recently toying with racial imagery. We’ve seen Cyrus twerking her way through the video for her big hit “We Can’t Stop,” professing her love for “hood music,” and claiming spiritual affinity with Lil’ Kim. Last night, as Cyrus stalked the stage, mugging and twerking, and paused to spank and simulate analingus upon the ass of a thickly set African-American backup dancer, her act tipped over into what we may as well just call racism: a minstrel show routine whose ghoulishness was heightened by Cyrus’s madcap charisma, and by the dark beauty of “We Can’t Stop” — by a good distance, the most powerful pop hit of 2013.

That’s giving way too much credit to Cyrus, the latest in a long line of privileged white kids to appropriate hip-hop culture, with cartoonish results. Equally laughable is the notion that she is responsible for “the most powerful pop hit of 2013.” (Perhaps Jody Rosen is actually a pen name for onetime Malcontent foil Duane Moody?)

Rosen concludes by warning, “A doctoral dissertation could (and will) be written on the racial, class, and gender dynamics of Cyrus’s shtick.” Paging Naomi Wolf.

Solemn celebrities sermonizing smugly

There’s an unmistakable template for socially conscious videos featuring politically active celebs, from the “Give Peace a Chance” reboot on the eve of the first Gulf War to the insufferable “Yes We Can” dirge produced by in 2008.

The latest, “I Am Bradley Manning,” is as laughably smug as you’d expect, with Maggie Gyllenhall and Moby trading polemics alongside Phil Donahue and Oliver Stone. Just when you think it can’t get any worse, up pops Russell Brand.



Dustin Lance Black confirms everything I told you about Dustin Lance Black

As longtime readers of the Malcontent know, I’m not a fan of the “Milk” screenwriter — an acquaintance from my Hollywood days who was equally smug and humorless.

Now comes word that Dusty Black will write a miniseries for ABC that “will be based on and told from [his] background and experiences as a gay rights activist,” according to The Hollywood Reporter.

Sounds riveting.

Advice from the self-proclaimed patriot who shit his pants to avoid military service

Nothing like winning gracefully — idiot Ted Nugent, who ranks ahead of the Matador as Detroit’s most lamentable export, thinks Robert Zimmerman should sue Trayvon Martin’s parents.

Trayvon Martin’s vicious attack on George Zimmerman and Martin’s tragic death have no doubt surely dragged Mr. Zimmerman through 18 months of untold emotional hell, pain, distress, anguish, fatigue, nightmares and financial ruin. Again, following the narrative of the pro-Trayvon media types and other race-baiters, if Trayvon Martin was a minor, then Trayvon Martin’s parents may be held liable for the emotional pain and suffering Mr. Zimmerman has been put through for the past 18 months, and surely for the rest of his life.

(source material for headline) 

ABC gives dangerous moron a platform

Jenny McCarthy is the exact opposite of everything Barbara Walters says about her in a statement announcing her new gig on “The View”

“Jenny brings us intelligence as well as warmth and humor,” said Walters, a notoriously bad judge of character who ran interference for Syrian mass murderer Bashar Al Assad as recently as 2011, calling him a “mild-mannered ophthalmologist” who became “dictator by accident” after his father and brother died.

McCarthy has a body count of her own thanks to her jihad against vaccination.