Get over yourself, Rolling Stone

Kudos on the McChrystal article, but Jann Wenner’s print celebration of all things plastic is far from hip. Matt Taibbi’s snide dispatches rarely impress, and movie “critic” Peter Travers is a eager whore.

*MIAMI VICE: “If you’re looking for a crime story that sizzles with action, sex and the visceral jolt of life on the edge, Miami Vice is the one.”

*MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE 3: “This summer M:i:III is the movie to beat in the race to push your pulse rate past the danger zone.”

*POSEIDON: “It’s a blast. Poseidon hits the action button and never stops!”

*SCHOOL FOR SCOUNDRELS: “Uproarious…fiendishly funny! The laughs come with a sting! Thornton and Heder keep you howling. Jon Heder orbits past his Napoleon Dynamite character at last by getting seriously fierce! A hot and rowdy funfest! Ben Stiller is in top form.”

Ninety percent of the magazine reads like “Entertainment Tonight” with curse words. Don’t believe their hype.

‘Freedom Fest,’ minus freedom of the press

A conservative Virginia blogger, sympathetic to the cause, was nonetheless booted from a right-wing pep rally Monday night once Coach Palin took to the mic. So much for transparency.

Palin’s fans, who don’t require a filter (hey, just like Hitler supporters), maintain their allegiance.

Annieflies says:
June 27, 2010 at 9:13 pm

Well it is no wonder that she doesn’t allow media, with all she’s had to put up with the last few years.

A final word on Chris Brown

Women seem as forgiving, if not more so, of the punk-ass bitch after his “comeback” performance Sunday night at the BET Awards. I trust these women have never been the victim of domestic violence — a problem that has not subsided, mainly because we live in a society too eager to absolve the unpardonable.

More second chances for thugs like Brown = more women getting beat up. As Oprah said, it a man hits you once, he’ll do it again.

On a lighter note, what kind of pussy falls to ground weeping midway through a Michael Jackson song? What a disgrace.

Guess who’s playing the victim again?

News flash: Sarah Palin is a total fucking idiot.

“Students who spent their valuable, precious time diving through dumpsters before this event in order to silence someone … what a wasted resource,” she told the crowd dining in the campus cafeteria.

No one was trying to silence her; rather, they wanted to know why a cash-strapped university would spend big bucks to bring a moron to campus to deliver well-rehearsed talking points.

(via Andisheh)

At least he didn’t list ‘Celebrity’

Woody Allen’s favorite Woody Allen movies?

Purple Rose of Cairo, Match Point, Bullets Over Broadway, Zelig, Husbands and Wives, and Vicky Cristina Barcelona. WTF?

“Zelig” is an underrated gem, and “Bullets” a clever diversion, but “Vicky Cristina Barecelona” is a a pretentious pile of shit — one of three Woody Allen movies I walked out on (along with “Celebrity” and “Hollywood Endings”).

Now we know why he doesn’t make movies like “Crimes and Misdemeanors” and “Hannah and Her Sisters” anymore — he doesn’t think they’re very good. Must be that twit Soon-Yi’s influence. (And if you wonder why I’m so derisive about Soon-Yi, watch the documentary about Allen, “Wild Man Blues.”)

Santorum: Hawaii is not a state

Fundamentalist conservative Rick Santorum, who once compared homosexuality to incest and beastiality, said Barack Obama “doesn’t identify with the average American because of his own background. Indonesia and Hawaii. His view is from the viewpoint of academics and the halls of the Ivy league schools that he went to and it’s not a love of this country and an understanding of the basic values and wants and desires of it’s people. And as a result of that, he doesn’t connect with people at that level.”

So because he wasn’t born in the continental U.S. Obama doesn’t connect with “the average American.” If only he could’ve been born to white Catholics in Pennsylvania then maybe he’d understand America as well as the bigot Santorum.

The rehabilitation of a woman-beating punk

Naturally the handjob media is playing along, applauding Chris Brown’s crocodile tears during his “emotional tribute” to Michael Jackson at the BET Awards.

Then, as Brown grabbed a microphone to sing “Man in the Mirror,” he broke down in tears. His voice cracked, he couldn’t sing, and at one point he crumpled to the stage in apparent agony. It was a moving moment made even more so by the song’s lyrics and his own recent past.

He’s never shown genuine remorse for beating the shit out of Rihanna and has whined about being a victim since his arrest. Shame on those so eager to rehabilitate the whiny bitch!

The Blogosphere Says What? (Get your pride on, bitch! edition)

In honor of the weekend that was Pride (everywhere but in Atlanta), enjoy this TBSW? flashback:

First of all, I lost my job as diversity coordinator at Diversity Today, the magazine for professionals in the diversity field. It was so unfair. No one’s been hit harder by this stupid recession than me! Fortunately, I’ve been able to make a living as a plaintiff in various class action lawsuits, including the one filed against the publisher of Diversity Today. I like to think I have good control of my emotions, but sometimes I gots to get my anger on. So I went to the publisher’s house last month, rang the door and screamed in his face.

It’s good to let your anger out, as I learned in the amazingly empowering documentary, “Waiting for Guffman.” That brave theater director really inspired me.

Things with Xander are a little shaky. I was so excited about Pride and Halloween and originally loved Xander’s idea that we dress as the amazing Liza Minnelli and her ex-husband, David Gest. That is, until Xander told me he would be going as Liza. He actually said I would make a more convincing David Gest. I just looked at him, shaking, with tears welling in my eyes. Then I just screamed at his ass face! … [more]

Some people are easily entertained

Actual comments lifted from YouTube regarding the theme song to “Friends,” included in my countdown of the Most Annoying Songs Ever:

2 weeks ago
Brillaint video and a brilliant song. Its so funny, in some respects even funnier than the show. The bit where Chandler and Joey are dancing and then they realize it and agreeably carry on is a perfect metaphor for easy going nature of the program. I love the lyrics. Sometimes you do feel like your life is in second gear but, you know what, all you need is your friends and they will help you out. Perfect.

2 weeks ago
i love how this series showcased different personalities who totally mesh well with one another! i can still remember laughing my heart out for every episode…i wonder why no one loved ross very much? is it because he’s wayyyy too serious and intellectual? i actually cannot rate who i like the most…i LOVE ALL of them!:)