sign of the apocalypse du jour

A movie directed by Michael Bay sets a new box office record.

The vision:

Producer Don Murphy was planning a G.I. Joe film adaptation, but when the United States took part in the invasion of Iraq in March 2003, Hasbro suggested adapting the Transformers franchise instead. Tom DeSanto joined Murphy because he was a fan of the series.

The poetry:

“Oh, no! The machine is buried in the pyramid! If they turn it on, it will destroy the sun! Not on my watch!”

The buzz:

Hasbro organized an enormous promotional campaign for the film, making deals with hundreds of companies. This advertising blitz included a viral marketing campaign, coordinated releases of prequel comic books, toys and books, as well as product placement deals with GM and eBay.

How bad is “Revenge of the Fallen”? Even Roger Ebert panned it; “a horrible experience of unbearable length.” Other reactions:

“Like watching paint dry while getting hit over the head with a frying pan!” (Bradshaw, Guardian); “Sums up everything that is most tedious, crass and despicable about modern Hollywood!” (Tookey, Daily Mail); “A giant, lumbering idiot of a movie!” (Edwards, Daily Mirror).

And yet Americans flock to it. Those who refuse to admit the idiocracy are bound to endure it — if only they knew what endure meant.

Revenge of the Arrested Adolescents
Revenge of the Arrested Adolescents