Bork flips, flops, and falls over tort reform

Irving Kristol once defined a neoconservative as a liberal who had been mugged by reality. By the same token, can a liberal be defined as a neoconservative who had suddenly found a need for the tort bar? We may find that out in a Manhattan court, where Robert H. Bork — the Supreme Court nominee rejected by the U.S. Senate in 1987 — filed a $1-million lawsuit today against the Yale Club of New York City, whose negligence, he says, was to blame for injuries he suffered in a fall at the club a year ago. Mr. Bork, who is 80, said…

“Oh my God. My arms are falling off my body”

All this Paris Hilton talk has reminded me of another spoiled brat. She was an old friend of mine and Miss Ellie’s. She was very, very dramatic. The headline above was an actual quote. She emerged from her room, white as a ghost, proclaiming that her arms were falling off her body. For real. We were so taken aback we didn’t know how to respond. Finally, “Could we get you a Coke and some Saltines?” I’m not sure if the soda and crackers were responsible, but miraculously her arms remained attached. She was consistently late paying her rent. One time she received…