a new low for cnn

Disgraced former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich is on Larry King, quoting Rudyard Kipling, the Bible and every political cliche ever uttered. There’s no new news regarding his pending corruption trial, unless you count his wife’s appearance on a new D-Minus-List reality show. No wonder CNN’s ratings are in the crapper.

Larry cues a clip showing Blago’s hideous wife manufacturing tears as she discusses their incomparable martyrdom. Elderly ex-model/coke whore Janice Dickinson speaks on his behalf: “Elected two times by the people.” MTV whore Spencer Pratt chimes in: “This is who I would’ve voted for president of the United States.” Later, Spencer’s born-again Christian wife (and fellow MTV whore) prays for Blago’s vindication.

Watch, but only if you think your time has no value whatsoever.

foghorn leghorn wins

Think of it this way: No more gawdawful campaign commercials.

headline du jour, only in Georgia edition

Chambliss, Martin stump today

Palin, Ludacris, former Miss Alaska campaigning

and the brounie goes too …

Named after congressman Paul Broun, who compared Obama to Hitler, the Brounie is awarded to Georgia politicians who make an ass of themselves, by word or deed.

This week’s winner: DeKalb County CEO Vernon Jones

Jones is allowing ego and political disappointment to disrupt the transfer of power to the Ellis administration. Given the great economic challenges awaiting Ellis and the taxpayers of DeKalb, Jones ought to be conferring with his successor several times a week and offering his full support and assistance. That isn’t exactly the case.

He’s also refused to endorse Jim Martin, who defeated him in a run-off for the U.S. Senate. Instead he’s worked to torpedo Martin’s chances against Republican Saxby Chambliss.

“Jim Martin did not want Obama to be president, but now he wants Obama to come down and help him get into the U.S. Senate,” said Jones. “He could not come to grips with voting for an African-American. … He voted for a man who had an affair and not an African-American who is married with two beautiful children.”

This is the same Jones who, facing a rape charge, acknowledged a consensual threesome.

the ghost of jefferson must intercede

Terry McAuliffe is apparently under the delusion that people find him likable.

Former Democratic National Committee chairman Terry McAuliffe signed papers Monday signaling a possible run for governor next year in Virginia. 

McAuliffe told The Associated Press he set up a campaign committee and will tour Virginia for the next 60 days before making his candidacy certain.

What’s next, Senator Begala? Secretary Carville? Ambassador (Dick) Morris?

random observations of the week that is

*Rahm Emanuel is a dick. That seems to be the consensus, and he represents the kind of attack dog partisanship I detest. That said, I wouldn’t read too much into his appointment as chief of staff. His job is to be the president’s gatekeeper. He won’t be the public face of the president, nor will he be instrumental in crafting policy. Maybe you need an asshole in that position. Still, I hope we don’t see an abundance of hacks in Obama’s administration.

*If Republicans weren’t so wed to narrow-minded ideologues Bush would’ve never been president. They could’ve nominated McCain in 2000, but he committed the cardinal sin of badmouthing narrow-minded fanatics like Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell. The base then lined up behind Bush, he fucks up, and now McCain takes the fall. In retrospect I wish Mitt Romney had won the nomination — he deserved to be humiliated.

*I hope Obama doesn’t appoint Robert Kennedy Jr. to head the EPA. He’s an activist, not a scientist, and he comes off as something of an alarmist. Plus, his voice annoys the hell out of me. Shouldn’t he have completed puberty by now?

*Sorry to see Gordon Smith lose his Oregon Senate seat. Smith was a reasonable Republican, moderate on issues such as gay rights. The GOP needs centrists, as much as they don’t want to acknowledge it.

*Unfortunately, Minnesota congresswoman Michelle Bachmann was re-elected. Now she’s praising Obama, though she hasn’t forgotten Joe the Opportunist.

*Rush Limbaugh called Obama a “Chicago thug” today. Welcome to exile, fat ass. (I read an interview with him recently in which he admitted to crying after his cat died. So I rescind the slur.)

“because you’re on television, dummy!”

“Network,” relevant as ever, raises difficult subjects and resists easy answers. God bless the polemic!

Take Howard Beale, introduced as a prophet — the voice of righteous indignation — and revealed as a fraud. Good rarely encounters evil anymore; better vs. worse, at best.

who is barack obama?

A lot like Bill McKay, methinks.

buying their silence

Making peace with the Clintons would challenge any diplomat:

It’s hard to fathom why Obama should be mau-maued into paying off the debt that Hillary and Bill accrued attacking and undermining him, while mismanaging the campaign and their nearly quarter-billion-dollar war chest so horribly that one Hillaryland insider told The New Republic that it bordered on fraud.

tomorrrow’s spin today

The Private Intellectual gets inside the mind of churlish Hillary strategist Mark Penn:

To: Interested Parties
From: Mark Penn
Re: Obama’s 75% Ceiling

While we heartily congratulate Senator Obama’s campaign on their Wisconsin victory, the final results must be less than heartening to the Obama campaign.

1) Obama has a ceiling of 75% of Democratic primary support. Barack Obama has consistently won primaries and caucuses with only 75% or less of the vote. In addition to effectively disenfranchising the at least 25% of the Democratic electorate that is not voting for him, the Obama camp cannot be happy that their candidate hasn’t reached 90% of the vote in any contest since the U.S. Virgin Islands on February 9.

2) Obama fails to win key demographics. Once again, Obama has not broken into the key demographic of voters who have been on a casino junket in the last thirty days. He also failed to win voters who had never heard of him, Wiccans, members of more than one bowling league, mourning dove hunters, white voters with “strongly negative” views of African Americans, and Vatican II-rejecting Catholics. These groups will only become more significant as the primary campaign shifts to Texas, Ohio, and Pennsylvania.

(via Reihan)

valentine’s day talking points

When I think about love, and wit, I think of the GOP. Taking advantage of their innate charms, the Republican National Committee is now offering a line of V-Day cards

Is there anything more romantic than trite partisanship?

(via Andrew Sullivan)

The Pepsi Challenge

If I ever get the chance to ask a question in a presidential debate, it would be this:

Do you prefer Coke or Pepsi? (Charcoal or propane? Chinese food or Mexican? Dogs or cats? … )

Such inane queries would actually reveal plenty, as you can bet certain candidates (usually those leading in the polls) would demur, deflect, triangulate … whatever necessary to avoid offending a particular cola constituency, or, say, cashiers who work at Panda Express. They don’t think very much of the American voter (and perhaps they shouldn’t).

Observe:

Gov. Romney, I know you’re a family man, so I’m guessing you know your way around a BBQ grill. Do you prefer charcoal or propane?

Romneytron (insincere chuckle): Well you can’t go wrong with a piece of USDA prime American meat, raised and fed by American workers right here at home, and I will fight for those workers, because I used to lay off people just like them, so I know exactly what they’re going through. I know how to turn this economy around, just like I turned around the Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City. I promise you that if I’m elected we will have unlimited surpluses, lower taxes and we’ll spend all the money necessary to help ensure my re-election in 2012.

Sir, with all due respect you didn’t answer my question. We all have a preference. I’m a charcoal guy, how ’bout you?

Romneytron: I enjoy that rich charcoal flavor, particularly if the briquettes are made in America.

You prefer charcoal then?

Romneytron: Now I didn’t say that. I also enjoy clean-burning propane. Taste the meat, not the heat, right? (insincere chuckle)

So you’re a propane man?

Romneytron: That’s a complete mischaracterization of my position. Look, I’m an outsider. I want to change Washington. I want to bring America together. Golly, I love this country. And one of the things I love most is that we are a nation that accepts people whether they prefer grilling with charcoal or propane. You think radical Islam let’s people make those kind of choices? My position is clear.

But governor …

Romneytron: Jeepers aren’t we all tired of this kind of gotcha politics? (inexplicable applause) And let me say this: John McCain supports amnesty, America is the greatest country ever, Ronald Reagan, I saved the Olympics, amnesty, change, God and Reagan.

The Danger of Closed Primaries

Open primaries typically produce candidates with broad appeal, mavericks who aren’t afraid to challenge party orthodoxy. Eliminate independents and crossover voters from the process and you end up with divisive nominees who advance by placating their base. And who makes up the respective bases? Shrill partisans, mainly, people like Hugh Hewitt and Terry McAuliffe.

Guess who’s banking on this decidedly undemocratic system:

For what it’s worth, Mike and I ran into a Clinton insider last night who offered an additional twist on this argument: Not only does Clinton do better among registered Democrats than she does among independents and Republicans. But he thought registered Democrats would be especially inclined to give her a second look after Iowa and New Hampshire because they’d resent having their nominee chosen by a bunch of interlopers.

Bush used this strategy to beat McCain in 2000. Think of this way: In a general election, would McCain have defeated Bush? Would Obama trump Hillary?

Could there be a stronger argument against closed primaries? Shouldn’t voters have more influence than parties?

(No, no, no and yes.)

Noted And Quoted, The Majority Speaks

"Most people are in the middle of the road —- though they may stay in the left lane or the right lane," argues Georgia’s former Sen. Sam Nunn, a Democrat and one of the organizers of the session. "The very extreme activists are in the ditch on both sides, and that’s where the money is."