Sarah Palin: Celebrities want to kill my children

Surprise: The drama queen plays the victim card while strolling the red carpet at the Iowa premiere of the *Palin propaganda opus.

“What would make a celebrity, like you saw on screen, so hate someone that they’d seek their destruction, their death, the death of their children?”

So David Letterman wants to murder Bristol, eh Sarah?

*By the way, the title of the Palin pic, “The Undefeated,” is quite misleading. Besides her failed 2008 run for the Blair House, she finished third in her bid to be Miss Alaska and lost in her quest for the GOP nomination for lieutenant governor in 2002. She’s been defeated as many times as not.

Achingly stupid media rehabilitation du jour

From Grantland staff writer Chris Ryan:

Bay steals Hitchcock’s look

We’ve got plenty of auteurs working today. We’ve got Johnnie To’s and Tarantino’s and Cholodenko’s and Refn’s. But when you walk into a dark theater on a hot summer day with a soda big enough to power a used Prius and your hands are already sticky from popcorn “butter” and you sit down, you might have paid at the Regal or Landmark or AMC box office, but when that title card flashes, “A Michael Bay Film” you are in his house now. And whether or not you agree with his sociopolitical point of view, his treatment of robots or his treatment of Megan Fox, you must admit that, for a couple of hours, it’s a pretty awesome place to be.

Yeah, that’s the problem with today’s movies: Too many auteurs, not enough Michael Bays.

Moron.

Junior Samples would’ve been 85 this year

The 20th Century’s most overrated figure (she actually touched poor people and once hugged someone with AIDS!) gets the 50th birthday treatment from Newsweek. It’s the UK’s most embarrassing fetish, as illustrated by Newsweek editor Tina Brown’s vacuous profile of the late princess:

“Diana would have been 50 this month,” she writes. “What would she have been like?”

Brown then seeks to answer her own question, saying the former Diana Spencer likely “would have gone the J. Crew and Galliano route a la Michelle Obama, always knowing how to mix the casual with the glam.”

“There is no doubt she would have kept her chin taut with strategic Botox shots and her bare arms buff from the gym,” said Brown, predicting her late friend would have made at least two more trips down the wedding aisle herself, probably “on both sides of the Atlantic.”

How have we survived without her?

The (allegedly) sexy schoolmarm look

Coach Palin originated it and Michele Bachmann is stealing it, claims Palin daughter Roger Clinton.

I think she dresses a lot like my mom. But a lot, a lot of women have done that the last few years. I do think it’s odd, you know, seeing people with red blazers with their hair up with glasses.

I don’t know if she’s wearing glasses but you want to be “Hummmm, do you think that people don’t notice you’re dressing like my mom?”